Hidden battles: Keeping cancer secret
Hidden battles: Keeping cancer secret
Harvard Health Publishing - Harvard Medical School; by Maureen Salamon; post is dated 4/1/25, retrieved from the internet 3/25/25
Some people choose to conceal their diagnosis and treatment. Here's why — and reasons that approach can sometimes backfire. ... [In addition to privacy motives, Cristina Pozo-Kaderman, a senior psychologist at Harvard-affiliated Dana-Farber Cancer Institute] says cancer patients may also wish to:
- avoid sympathy or being treated differently
- bypass burdening or alarming others
- protect their job
- feel in control of an uncertain situation
- avoid fielding intrusive questions
- sidestep judgment if their cancer is linked to lifestyle choices.
... Secrecy disadvantages: Despite someone's desire for privacy, cancer often shows itself in ways that are hard to hide — whether that's hair loss, excessive weight loss or gain, or extreme fatigue. If people don't know the truth, they may make incorrect assumptions about what's happening. ... It's helpful to have what Pozo-Kaderman calls "pocket phrases" ready to shut down any unwanted inquiries. You can say:
- I'm having a cancer-free day.
- I'll share more information another time, but not today.
- Thanks for asking. I'm doing okay — but how are you?
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